Dilemma

Salam dear friends,

Malam tadi ada something spooky happened to me. Tak suka tau. But I have to admit, benda benda halus ni memang wujud dan kerja dia nak mengacau dan menyesatkan manusia.

Aariz kan penakut sangat. Yes I know, dekat rumah only left me and him. So, indirectly, Aariz sangat depends on me on a lot of things. Most of all as his companion. Peneman dia lah kan. Since hubby is working away from home and we only sees each other either once a month or two months once. Aariz kemana mana aku pergi mesti nak ikut, termasuk dalam JAMBAN!!! hiyarghhhhh! tak tenang mak tau.

So bila balik dari kerja, what I do when I want to shower, is to drag him along with me into the toilet and we both happily shower together. Walaupon dia baru lepas mandi kat sekolah, aku mandi kan juga, dari nak dengar dia meratap hiba meleleh-leleh hingus.

Haritu, aku ada dengar Al-kuliyyah, dah lama jugak. Dalam3-4 months back pasal gangguan ni kan. Anak anak yang lahir premature, prone to gangguan sebab anak anak ni lemah. Maybe sebab lahir premature, banyak sistem dalam badan yang belum betul fully developed dan syaitonirajim ni macam biasa lah ambil kesempatan keatas anak anak yang lemah ni. Jadi, aariz pon tergolong dalam anak anak yang premature. He was born when he was 35 weeks old. Tapi Alhamdulillah, Aariz wan doing fine so far.

So far nothing major happen to him, cuma dulu dulu dia ada lah mengangis tiap tiap malam start dari pukul 10 malam sampai 2 pagi. Everynight the same time dalam 3 weeks benda ni berlanjutan. Sampai babah aku kena azan dekat telinga Aariz baru lah dia diam dan tenang. Masa tu umur aariz dalam 3 months old. Kami jumpe sorang ustaz Al-Hafiz dan ustaz tu suruh mandikan dengan air yang ustaz tu dah baca dengan ayat ayat Al-Quran. Kebetulan ustaz tu guru yang mengajar mama aku mengaji. Alhamdulillah, Aaariz baik lepas aku mandi kan dengan air tu sebanyak 3 kali.

Dulu, sebelum aku kahwin, aku ada kelebihan (atau kekurangan :(  kut) dapat tengok makhluk halus. Terus terang, aku memang tak suka. Tapi aku terima apa yang Allah bagi dengan hati terbuka. I always keep in mind bukan semua orang diberi peluang dapat tengok benda benda tu. Tapi sekarang kelebihan tu dah tak ada dah dan aku pon tak nak tengok lagi. Its making me feel uneasy tau! Tapi abang sulong aku memang boleh nampak sampai la ke harini. Infact masa dia pergi umrah dan kebetulan dia baca yaasin duduk berhadapan dengan tiang Jin, dan ramai ramai menumpang dengar dia baca yasin! bukan orang ye.

Jadi, malam tadi aku terjaga tengah malam. Aku pon perasan Aariz lately ni banyak terjaga tengah malam lepas tu menangis cakap takut. Lepas aku peluk, pujuk baru lah dia lena tidur balik.Oh melalut pulak,lepas aku terjaga malam tadi, I saw something that I shouldn't see in my room. I saw a shodow macam asap warna hitam was passing by from my window ke tempat penyidai towel aku. At that time kebetulan aku kena himpit. Dah lama sangat aku tak tidur kena himpit! dah bertahun and it happen again last night. While I was struggling to free myself that is the time I saw the thing. It was quite far from me. I was in the battle macam macam surah aku baca, sambil menjerit jerit dalam tidur than I lost in the battle by falling asleep. Yes, that happen under my subconscious mind!

Then, I recall back, MasyaAllah, 2-3 days back there is some funny thing happen to me too. Macam sequel pulak. Masa tidur, aku terjaga tengah malam, I saw something was trying to step me on my tummy! Kurang ajar! Benda tu pendek dan kecik aje. Adalah tinggi2 tinggi budak 3-4 tahun. Then again I lost is the battle by falling asleep. The next night, Aariz menangis tengah malam cakap takut. Beria-ia  nangis that i have to soothe him sampai la Aariz tidur balik hinggalah ke kejadian malam tadi. It happen 3 days in a row.

My routine nowadays, aku memang baca al-quran lepas solat subuh, sejak aku preggy ni. Setiap kali lepas solat I will recite Al-fatihah,3 Kul dan ayat kursi. Itu memang wajib, sebab pada aku, that is my defends as a human to protect my entire day. Sebelum tidur aku suruh Aariz baca Alfatihah dan alhamdulillah dengan pelat pelat dia, dia dah dapat hafal. Ayat kursi aku tak ajar lagi sebab panjang sangat. I want to introduce to him one by one.

What actions should I do after this? Well, I have to increase my security after this. Instead of baca surah surah yang aku biasa amalkan kan. I now have to add more surahs to my daily routine. Surah Nurun-nabuwwah dan bimlillah 6. I think for the time being, InsyaAllah that should be enough. And I have to tell my parents. Just to let them know. Aku dah bagitahu laki aku. He ask me to pasang alquran dalam bilik. InsyaAllah I will do.

To give up? No, as a mother, I will not give up. Rasa takut? Hanya pada Allah swt aku patut rasa takut. I will try my best to cast them away. I leave there, that is my home! You do not disturb. If you think that hubby is away you kan afraid me, you are wrong, I will try my very best to protect me and my family. InsyaAllah.

P/s: Please pray for our safety ye dear friend:)